Hitchhikers guide to Bangalore! (Beggars Episode 1)

Bangalore. The capital city of Karnataka where 90% of population is from Andhra, 70% Tamilnadu, 60% North Indians and the last and the least is 4% is actually the kannadigas. That sums up to 224%.
Yes, Bangalore is over populated.

But, what makes Bangalore famous? Apart from its countless startups, innovations, MNCs, Engineers and street dogs what makes Bangalore famous is its rich, talented, highly qualified Beggars. I personally don’t want to group every category of beggars into one and explain you because I support individual talents.

In this series of writing I am going to (re)introduce you to the 5 kinds of beggars, their type, behavior and how to escape from them *haiyaaaaaa*  (weird Kung-fu noise).

1) “Bhaiyya aapko Hindi aathi hai?…

Identification: This beggar comes with an old school bag (mostly black) on his back which looks like it’s filled with some heavy books or clothes.  You will see one SPOC (Single point of contact) who will speak with you. Accompanied with an old man, a woman holding a baby in her hand. An old women which might be the old man’s wife but who are we to judge?
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BehaviorThis beggar comes towards you and starts talking for no reason. Every conversation starts like this “Bhaiyya aapko Hindi aathi he? “ If you say “YES”. CONGRATULATIONS!! You are his new adopted “Bhaiyya!”.
If you say “NO”. He will never give up, he will move to next language. “Bhaiyya Kannad aatha he?”, “tamil aath he?..”  And this continues with Spanish, French, Hebrew and every single language on the planet until you say “YES”.  Then the best part comes. The story telling.

Hum Maharashtr se aaye hein. Yaaha pe hamare owner ne hamme dhoka dhedhiya. Hamara sab paisa samaan loot liya, Hamare pas kuch nahi he. Subha se kuch nahi khaya, bachcha ro raha he! (points at the old man). Kuch paisa dhe dho bhaiyya hum maharastr jaayenge aur wahan se aapke account pe paisa daal dhenge.

Experience: I was caught by these guy once. It was my first encounter. I heard his whole story, literally bust out laughing when he said “Kuch paisa dhe dho bhaiyya hum maharastr jaayenge aur wahan se aapke account mein paisa daal dhenge”. Dude! Seriously? Bank account number kaafi he? IFCSI code nahi chahiye kya? I gave him whatever was there in my wallet (50. Rs) Just for his story telling and told him “Ithna hi he bhai”. Then I was my way out from there, then he counted the money with a fake sadness on his face. Then he looked at me and asked “Bhaiyya udhar ATM he kuch paisa nikaal ke dhedhona ?” !. That’s all I jumped out of the crowd before he ask for my ear rings.

Escape: The best and proven method to escape from these beggars is simple. First you need to remember the above story. So when they approach you and ask “Bhaiyya aapko Hindi aathi hai?…
Just stop them and you start “Haan Bhaiyya Hindi aathi he..

Hum Maharashtr se aaye hein. Yaaha pe hamare owner ne hamme dhoka dhedhiya. Hamara sab paisa samaan loot liya, Hamare pas kuch nahi he. Subha se kuch nahi khaya, bacha ro raha he! (point at the old man). Kuch paisa dhe dho bhaiyya hum maharastr jaayenge aur wahan se aapke account pe paisa daal dhenge”.

This will literally piss them off and they will just leave.

Please Try this and share your experience.

*That’s all folks*

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2 most SEXiest untold places in the Internet.

So, let me start writing again! This has been under my radar for several days now. It keeps on annoying me every time I look at it. Let me share my views.

In India you can sell anything with just a Sharukh khan’s photo on it. If it doesn’t work, how about nude girls? And with Idea’s brainless IIN advertisement going around the corner, its highly impossible to watch the television.

Your next point of escape from the reality would be Facebook but wait! You know it. The IIN’s identical twins are already there in Facebook which shares same insane brainless one liners, they call it as comedy!. Shares the same post on their page copied from a much popular American and UK blogs which Indian’s are not aware.

Did you guess the page yet?

OK. Last clues. One rhymes with Poop, another rhymes with Dick.
Yup! That’s correct. Scoopwhoop and Storypick.

People!! wake up. Don’t waste your time by clicking on “24 reasons which will help your love life”, “15 reasons for successful Date”, “23 reasons to know if your bae is mad at you”. Trust me, If you are ugly. “you are ugly”. That’s it. Even 1000 reasons wont help you.  These are just a pathetic titles to gather dumb audience and get more page hits. Just think about it, If they really want to share the things with you, why din’t they put it in their Facebook status instead of sharing the link on their page?

And here comes second kind of posts “what she did in the end is totally unpredictable”, “what happens next is mind blowing” at the end of the post you always predict what will happen just like each and every fucking Bollywood movie and you also realize that you have already wasted 2 minutes of your boring life 213 times already.

As a responsible citizen of India (I pay my Taxes OK.) and also a internet activist I started an initiative to open each and every post they put and copy the contents from the page (like 13 reasons, 6 reasons) and paste it in the comment of these posts. So that others don’t waste their time opening the page and making fool of themselves. Whenever someone sees the post they just need to read the comment. Thats all.

“see? what and all we do for our loved ones”.

This was going well for few days. Also got a huge response from anonymous Facebook members.  Some of them started scolding and humiliating because I am a boy, that explains a lot in a  social networking site. (If you can be anything, Always be a girl in Facebook).

And just like all good things comes to an end. Scoopwhoop people just blocked me from commenting. And I became a silent guardian. A watchful protector for their stupid posts (batman music plays in the background). until one day…

*Several hundred hours later*

All the previous things did not grind my gears. But you know what really grind my gears? Its the sexist posts and a very bad way of attracting the audience. Internet is already aware that (only) Indian men are horny. If you don’t agree..  Chapter1: “9Chat” start from here . The so called entertainment blogs are not new to the internet. They know the strength and weakness of every audience. Just looking at every day pattern with scoopwhoop I wanted to share you the posts they did during the night hours. This will tell you that the sun is not the only thing that goes down at night even the standards of this page.

Posted at around 11.30 PM. The content of the post is completely different form the image picked to advertise it.
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Talking about Feminism? Find the exposing picture of same women and use it for catch the audience.

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Find the post which has something to do with Sex in it  and use it in the picture to attract Indian audience.

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Some times all it takes is 18 random men from 18 random part of the world to put up a post which has a word “sex” in it.

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And This is how you attract audience. Even though the content of the news is just 3 screenshots.

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“Horrific list of torture methods” – ok. Let me use a naked man in a bondage.

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IRONY! at its peak.

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Wait! This reminds me of “This is how we deal with the creeps” post they just did. and This is how the creeps are born.

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Yes! Please Show us.

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A “Queen’s Vagina” in the post is all it needs to attract everyone.

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So these are only a few posts I picked it up from last 2 – 3 days. This pattern is going for very very long time. All these posts are made after 8PM. The quality of these sites are as close to any other desi porn sites unlike this desi porn sites wont disappoint us.

I don’t know what does the author of these blogs think about the Indian readers (of course ‘sab ke sab choothye hein saale‘)?  are we so cheap mentality people? and this is the same blog which talks about anti-rape/feminism/sexism.  The root of the problem is not these sites. The root is with in us who clicks on these stupid posts and increase their site visits which encourages them to make more and more chutya out of us. again and again.

Please don’t encourage this. Next time you see any horny posts report it to Facebook directly.  Share the news, Spread the world.

Gyaan: Being Horny is not wrong but being horny and choothya is.

*TEE HEE*
**That’s All Folks**
**

Facebook ‘Graphic App’ Privacy Warning Hoax

The msg or the status looks like this

"Hello to all of you who are on my list of contacts of Facebook.
I would like to ask a favor of you…. You may not know that Facebook has changed its privacy configuration once again. Thanks to the new "Graphic app", any person in Facebook anywhere in the world can see our photos, our "like" and our “comments”. During the next two weeks, I am going to keep this message posted and I ask you to do the following and comment "DONE". 
Those of my friends who do not maintain my information in private will be eliminated from my list of friends, because I want the information I share with you, my friends, to remain among my friends and not be available to the whole world. I want to be able to publish photos of my friends and family without strangers being able to see them which is what happens now when you choose "like" or "comment".
Unfortunately we cannot change this configuration because Facebook has made it like this. 
So, please, place your cursor over my photo that appears in this box (without clicking) and a window will open. Now move the cursor to the word "Friends", again without clicking and then on "Settings". 
Uncheck "Life Events" and "Comments and Like". 
This way my activity with my family and friends will no longer be made public. Now, copy and paste this text on your own wall (do not "share" it!). 
Once I see it published on your page, I will un-check the same for you."

Versions of this message have been circulating vigorously on Facebook since late 2012.  The messages claim that, due to recent configuration changes by Facebook, total strangers all over the world can now see photos and comments we post on Facebook as well as any “likes” we make on the network.
The latest incarnation of the message blames this supposed privacy breach on what it refers to as Facebook’s new “Graphic app”.  The message features step-by-step instructions that it claims will counteract the changes and protect the privacy of users.

However, the claims in the messages are utter nonsense. Facebook has not made changes that fundamentally compromise the privacy of its users as claimed in the message. Material you post on Facebook will be accessible by others based on the privacy settings you have chosen. Just as it always has.

Whoever created the message either had a fundamentally flawed understanding of even basic Facebook privacy settings, or was deliberately intending to spread misinformation.

The “Graphic app” reference is apparently alluding to the Graph Search functionality which has been fairly recently introduced on the network. It is not an app. Nor does using Graph Search compromise the privacy of Facebookers in the way suggested in the hoax message. Information about Graph Search from Facebook itself notes:

                 “Graph Search results are personalized for you, just like News Feed is unique to you. For example, if you search for Photos of Tokyo, you’ll see photos friends took in Tokyo and shared with you, as well as Public photos related to Tokyo.This means if 2 people search “Photos of my friends in Tokyo,” they’re going to see different results.”

If you have your Facebook account set to “Public”, then, certainly, information you post on the network may show up in Graph Search results.  But, given that any material you have set to “Public” can always be seen by anyone who cares to access it, then its appearance in Graph Search is of no consequence whatsoever. Conversely, if you have your privacy settings configured to show material to “friends only”, then only your friends will see your material when they use Graph Search. So what of the instructions outlined in the message? The settings discussed allow you to control what types of updates you see from a given Facebook friend. Thus, obeying the instructions will do nothing more than stop you from seeing much of what your friend is doing on Facebook. And, if your friends uncheck you as advised in the message, they will no longer see what you are doing either.  Obviously, the procedure outlined is not a logical, sensible or effective method of protecting your privacy on Facebook. And, furthermore, the procedure is completely unnecessary. To reiterate, to control who sees material you post on Facebook, all you need to do is access your account’s Privacy Settings and configure it as you see fit. This privacy control is available to all Facebook users at any time. It is high time that this piece of Facebook drivel was put down once and for all. If you receive one of these messages, do not follow the instructions it contains. And take a moment to let the person who posted it know that the claims in the message are unmitigated nonsense.
via Facebook ‘Graphic App’ Privacy Warning Hoax.

Samsung Galaxy S4 : Best phone to buy under 30,000 INR [1st july 2013]

Samsung has just launched its flagship device the Galaxy S 4 at an event in New York. The flagship Samsung device is, of course, packed with features such as Smart Pause, Smart Scroll, Air View etc. Samsung is touting this one as your ‘Life Companion’. No really, not joking that’s their tag line as announced in the Broadway-style launch.

In terms of specifications, the smartphone comes with 2 GM RAM, has a full HD AMOLED display with a five-inch screen and a pixel density of 441 pixels per inch. The screen resolution is 1920×1080 pixels.

The phone will come in 32 and 64 GB versions with a microSD card slot which has a 64GB limit. The device has a removable 26oo mAh battery. It has eight sensors, which includes the usual acceleromter, Digital compass, Gyrometer etc. The new sensors are the IR Gesture sensor aka the infrared LED for remote control functions (more on that later) and a sensor for temperature and humidity control.

It has a 1.9Ghz quad-core Snapdragon processor and there is another version with a 1.6 octa-core processor. The processor will depend on the market. India should get the octa-core processor. The device runs Android 4.2.2. version of Jelly Bean along with a generous helping of Samsung’s TouchWiz user interface.

The device of course supports 4G LTE and Samsung is launching two versions of the phone 4G and 3G. The device also supports Wi-Fi, Bluetooth 4.0 and NFC. The rear camera is 13 megapixels while the front one is 2 megapixels.

And yes… the device does look a lot like the Galaxy S III. So what has changed? Here’s a look some of the features of this smartphone.

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Smart Scroll, Smart Pause: The rumour mills had indicated that the Galaxy S4 would allow you to ‘eye scroll’ but Samsung has fallen back on face recognition technology. The phone detects if you’re not looking at the smartphone and will pause a video. Also you can simply tilt the phone to scroll up or down while reading. Smart Scroll will allow you to scroll through content on the screen such as email with face movements and wrist gestures.

Samung Galaxy S4. Life companion? Reuters
Air Gesture: This is pretty similar to what the AirView feature does on the Galaxy Note II with the SPen. This allows users to pick up calls by just swiping their hand over the device without touching the screen. You can control and unlock the phone without touching it as well.

Air View functionality is also available and allows users to preview the content by simply holding or hovering their finger over it. Air View works for email, Flipboard, photos and calendar.

Dual Video calls: This is a pretty cool feature as it allows someone to see what’s going on in your back camera while you speak to them via the front camera. Sounds interesting.

S Voice Drive: S Voice, Samsung’s answer to Apple’s Siri has got a pretty serious upgrade as well. S Voice Drive will answer messages, read out texts, etc, all without users having to type them while you’re driving.

Samsung Knox: Kind of like the BlackBerry Balance features, this will allow users to keep their work profiles separate from the fun private stuff.

Samsung Group Play: Basically users can sync their Samsung Galaxy S4 devices into one giant stereo and play music all at the same time. This holds for upto 8 devices.

S Translator: This feature allows users to translate from speech to text and text to speech and currently supports 9 languages excluding English. These are French, Latin American Spanish, German, Italian, Chinese, Japanese and Brazilian Portuguese. Samsung has also put an Optical Reader app where users can take photos of signs in other languages and the app will translate them and this comes with off-line support, means you don’t have to be connected all the time to use it.

Adapt Display: This feature will adjust the screen settings, such as brightness and contrast according to the light conditions around you.

Story Albums: This allows users to make Story Albums out of their photos. The app will let users tag their photos, add captions and you can upload them to Facebook straight on. Samsung has signed up with Blurb to let US users print hard copies of these albums for a fee.

Home Sync: The Galaxy S4 can be synced to television devices etc via Samsung’s Home Sync device. It allows upto eight users, has 1 TB cloud storage and content played on television can be viewed on S4 or you can transfer files and photos to your TV. Note: The Home Sync is an actually device. The S4 can be connected to it via Near Fields Communications (NFC).

Dual Camera: This allows to the smartphone to record using both cameras at once. The main video from the back camera is overlayed with the a smaller size video from the front camera. You can choose various styles for the front camera recording.

Eraser, Sound & Shot: Samsung Galaxy S4′s camera will also allow you to get rid of photo-bombers. You can edit them out with the Eraser option. The Sound & Shot option allows you to record five seconds of audio before shooting.

Drama Shot: Another camera feature, the Galaxy S 4 can take more than a 100 shots in 4 seconds and then select these to form a dramatic picture.

Remote Control Support: Thanks to the IR Led blaster and the WatchOn app uses can use the S4 like a remote control for any television.

Samsung has of course packed the smartphone with tons of features. The device will be hitting most countries by April. Samsung has not revealed the price of the smartphone.

Facebook’s “Kill Google” agenda

Facebook’s glistening new search engine makes finding interesting things about yourself, your past, and all of your friends excitingly easy. It also makes it a cinch to find strangers who are openly racist, sexist, and generally embarrassing. This is fun!

Nothing that wasn’t public before Graph Search will be public after Graph Search, but that doesn’t change the fact that digging up inadvertently-shared info is effortless. This is bad news for probably millions and millions of people who are going to have trouble finding jobs once the new search goes public.

 

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So as a personal Opinion What you can expect from Facebook’s new Search engine.
1# Cool ,Color full (BLUE) : : As people are very much attached with the Google which is white and no fancy color , Facebook     may come with its “Magical Blue” color.

2#SloOOOOoowww.. : We are not so sure of the speed at which u get the results  but pretty sure nothing can be faster than Google with fetching the results and loading the images. we can expect a very slow result fetching and loading comparative with the Google.

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3#Its SOCIAL search engine:  Its a social search engine . and quite different from the google it fetches details from ur friends in facebok or any pages in the facebook in nut shell it shows what is “IN FACEBOOK” nothing outside the box.
so if ur searching for youtube videos u ‘may’ not get the expected results well you know ;)

4#Embrace yourself Facebook meme’s are on its way: of course its a new attempt by facebook we cannot expect 100% accuracy and Strict results , we assure u there will be as many bad results as possible :D :D and there are some smart people like me  (thank you !) who don’t want to loose these opportunities will bring the fun from all those results .

So are you ready here is the Link –> “LINK” <—

scroll down and click on the Join button :D :D you may get asap :)
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